thecompanionsdoctor:

Whenever my friend says goodnight to me on Skype he sends me this gif

and I wanted to send it to him tonight so I went to Google “black man turning off lamp” but Google autofill changed it to “black man turning into jet” and I got this

Long story short it’s 1am and I’ve been laughing at this for approximately 20 years

danimansutti:

really nothing nicer than someone saying “saw this and thought of you”

roughrimjob:

I feel really shitty and useless but at the same time I’m still perfect and better than anyone

esexist:

there is a thin line between being sassy and being an asshole and i cross it everyday

pizza:

my favourite thing to do the night before homework is due is to finish it then read the criteria sheet and realise i’ve done it all wrong

drarna:

instead of learning from my mistakes i like to dwell on them until i have a panic attack.

positivemilk:

But mom how am I suppose to buy drugs with a gift card

homleschapel:

summer is real cute until every fuckin type of insect comes out of the 8th circle of hell

swaggie2nope:

i cant old sport understand old sport your accent

hungarian:

i’ll never delete my tumblr so when my kids are like “ugh MOM u don’t understand”, i’ll show them my tumblr so they can realize i was once young & laughed at dick jokes